A Turning Point in My Life

The last couple of weeks have been heavy on my heart since Charlie Kirk’s passing. It’s been one of those seasons where my spirit feels both broken and awakened at the same time. I’ve carried a mix of emotions that are hard to put into words, and yet they keep pressing on my heart, asking to be spoken.

• Grief over the death of an innocent man.

• Heartbreak and anger at the cruelty and mockery surrounding his death.

Those two truths alone have been enough to weigh heavy on my spirit, but they’ve also stirred something deeper in me - a conviction that I can no longer stay silent in my faith, even when it’s scary and costly. And along with that conviction have come the questions that stir in me daily: Am I strong enough? Am I bold enough? Will I truly stand when it costs me?

These aren’t just fleeting feelings I can shake off by the next morning. They are deep stirrings that wake me up at night and linger in my prayers. And while they feel heavy, they are also holy. Because underneath the grief, I sense God calling me into something deeper - a courage that isn’t my own. A courage that can only come from His Spirit alive in me.

And here’s what I’m realizing - it’s not just about being bold enough to write a blog or publish books. People may already see me that way. But this shift in me goes deeper. It’s no longer about carefully choosing words so I don’t rock the boat or tiptoe around the feelings of people who don’t care about mine anyway. It’s about a holy boldness - a willingness to voice my convictions without fear of rejection, offense, or loss.

I know I can’t go back to being the same. Something has shifted inside of me - a desire for boldness without compromise. To draw the line the way Charlie did, with conviction and courage that points to Christ, no matter what it costs.

Jesus warned us this day would come:

“You will be hated by everyone because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved.” ~ Matthew 10:22

At first glance, those words sound weighty, even frightening. But the more I sit with them, the more I see the promise hidden inside. Jesus doesn’t just warn us - He reminds us that when we stand firm, there is salvation, there is reward, there is eternal hope.

This moment in time feels like a crossroads. I can either shrink back into silence to keep the peace, or I can step forward with boldness, knowing it will cost me. And let’s be honest - it will. Relationships may shift. People may misunderstand. But I take comfort in this: my Savior knows what it feels like. He was mocked. He was hated. He was betrayed. He carried His cross with love, and with His strength, I can carry mine too.

So yes, this is a turning point in my life. The weight is real, but so is the hope. And as I walk this path, my prayer is simple: Help me, Jesus. Because if I have Him, then I have everything - strength when I am weak, courage when I am afraid, and boldness when my knees shake.

Have you ever felt the weight of conviction pressing on your spirit, knowing you couldn’t stay silent anymore? It’s heavy, yes - but it’s also holy ground. These are the very moments where God grows our faith, deepens our roots, and births courage we never thought possible.

Lord Jesus, You see the grief and the fear, but You also see my heart’s desire to stand for You. Give me Your strength when I am weak, Your courage when I want to shrink back, and Your joy in the midst of the cost. May my life point only to You. In Your mighty name, Amen.

If you’re standing at your own turning point, sis, please know you don’t have to walk it alone. Jesus is with you every step of the way - and I’m walking it too. Let’s stand together in faith, lifting each other up, and trusting God’s promises with every step forward.

Charlie’s life and example reminded me that boldness is costly - but it’s also worth it. If he could stand with conviction until the very end, then I want my life to reflect the same. No compromise. No turning back. All for the glory of Jesus.